This does sound as if you've got a better handle on who you are, though I won't be surprised if it continues to change back and forth for a while.

I think your real problem in the end is that in our culture we expect people to be either male or female, and the language reinforces that. There simply *is* no easy way in English to refer to someone who is in between. So even for someone who will happily to refer to a person by social gender regardless of birth gender, at any particular point in time it's got to be one of "Sir" or "Madam" -- to use the example from when I was working on a shop till, with a script I was supposed to stick to, and the occasional customer who didn't fit it.